The Cure of Hopelessness
1. Power of Allah
Praise be to Allah for His supreme and absolute authority over the vast universe; the earth and the seven skies. He sets the course of the stars and the planets; and not a leaf falls without His permission. He is able to do what He wills. Intellect and reason get bewildered in trying to understand His Might and Greatness. Can such an Almighty be unable to fulfill the meagre needs of his creatures. Certainly not! So how can hopelessness be justified.
2. Personal Experiences
One must ponder upon the various blessings Allah bestowed on us in the past and which we had taken for granted. The Almighty has brought us safely out of the darkness of the womb. He is thoughtful of our needs and He knows them better than our ownselves, and fulfills them without our asking. He has rescued us from many a dangerous situations, disease and calamities. He has bestowed numerous blessings, physical, material, mental, social and spiritual upon us yet we become undeniable of our standing as individuals. Then why should there be hopelessness? Is He unaware of our condition? I seek forgiveness from the Almighty Allah! Allah is far too exalted.
3.Outward Examples
Let us study the situation of those who were in extremely difficult times but were hopeful of the Lord's Benevolence and Mercy. They continued to entreat Allah till He accepted their prayers and redressed them.
Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) and His Male Child
Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) was one hundred and twelve years and according to another report one hundred and twenty years. His respected wife Hazrat Sarah was ninety-seven years. They did not have any children. Allah sent to them an Angel to inform them that they would be gifted with a son.
"And his wife was standing (by), so she laughed, then We gave her the good news of Ishaq and after Ishaq of (a son's son) Yaqub."
"She said: O wonder! Shall I bear a son when I am an extremely old woman and this my husband an extremely old man? Most surely this is a wonderful thing."
"They said: Do you wonder at Allah's bidding? The Mercy of Allah and His blessings are on you, O People of the house, surely He is Praised, Glorious."
(Surah Hud 11: 71-73)
In brief, the Mercy of Allah blessed Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) and Janabe Sarah with a son, Ishaq, at an age when it could never have been expected.
Hazrat Zakaria (a.s.) and his Son Yahya (a.s.)
The age of Hazrat Zakaria (a.s.) was ninety-nine years and that of his wife eighty nine. Yet, he was hopeful of the Grace of Allah and he prayed with sincerity, "He said My Lord! Surely my bones are weakened and my head flares with hoariness, and my Lord! I have never been unsuccessful in my prayer to Thee: And surely I fear my cousins after me, and my wife is barren, therefore grant me from Thyself an heir, who would inherit me and inherit from the children of Yaqub, and make him, my Lord, one in whom Thou art well pleased."
O Zakaria! Surely We give you good news of a boy whose name shall be Yahya: We have not made before anyone his equal. He said,
"O my Lord! When shall I have a son, and my wife is barren, and I myself have reached the excessive degree of old age? He said: "So shall It be, your Lord says: It is easy to Me, and indeed I created you before, when you were nothing."
(Surah Maryam 19:4-9)
Thus Allah accepted the invocation of Hazrat Zakaria (a.s.) and Hazrat Yahya (a.s.) was born to him.
If one is suffering from some disease for a long time and there seems to be no hope of curing it, one must consider this disease to be a penalty for his sins (kaffara).
On the other hand if due to his prayers and Sadaqah the disease is cured it becomes a mean of salvation.
Hazrat Ayyub (a.s.) and Tribulations
If one intends to achieve humility and insight, he must study the life of Hazrat Ayyub (a.s.). After being inflicted with a horrible disease for seven years and according to other reports for eighteen years, he prayed to Allah.
"And Ayyub, when he cried to his Lord, (saying): Harm has afflicted me, and Thou art the most Merciful of the Mercifuls."
(Surah Anbiya 21:83)
Allah responded to his entreaty by curing his malady and also gave him wealth as before.
Hidden Wisdom in Poverty and Destitution
If one is afflicted with poverty for a long time and is unable to see a way out, then this situation can be viewed in two ways: First, it is possible that there may be a hidden wisdom in his poverty, and if he had access to this knowledge he may himself opt this state for himself and be happy in the bargain.
Secondly, those who spend the earlier part of life in poverty usually become enriched at a later stage and therefore have a comfortable time in their old age.
Wealth in the Empty Hands
As an example an incident is quoted from the book "Faraz Baadashshuda": A rich businessman says, 'I was travelling for Hajj and had 3000 dinars and gold and silver ornaments with me. I had tied them up in a bag attached to my cummerbund. But I dropped this bag when I went to answer the call of nature. I had proceeded many miles further, when I realized my bag was missing. I had a lot of wealth so I did not find it imperative to go back and look for my money nor was it possible to return. When I came back to my native site one calamity upon another befell me. Gradually all my wealth disappeared. My public respect began to change into shame. Due to embarrassment before friends, gossip of the enemies and further destitution I was compelled to leave my native village. During this journey I spent a night in a hamlet. At this time, all the money I had was one-sixth of a silver coin. It was a dark, rainy night. I took my wife to a cheap hostel for the night. All of a sudden my wife began to have labour pains and a child was born. My wife said that she needed something to eat, otherwise she may starve to death. I took the slender silver coin and knocked at the door of a vegetable seller. After repeated requests he opened the door. I explained to him my circumstances and gave him the coin. He brought some curd and ghee in an earthen bowl. As I turned back and walked a few paces, I slipped and the earthen bowl dropped from my hands and broke. I was struck with grief and could not control myself. I began to slap my face and yelled loudly. The window of a nearby house opened and someone enquired as to who I was and why was I creating a din and disturbing the neighbourhood. I explained my circumstances in brief and added that I, my wife and the child were starving of hunger, and this misfortune has befallen me. The man asked, "Is your hue and cry only for a piece of silver." 'No', I said, "I had never been so miserly." Then I told him about the year when I had lost my bag of 3000 dinars and ornaments. He asked me if there were any distinguishing marks on my moneybag. I thought he was trying to fool me, so I protested. But he insisted and I told him. Then he called me in his house and sent his slave to get my wife and child. The slave returned with my wife and child, and our host put us up for the night. In the morning he gave some dinars and said that till my wife recovers, we must stay in his house. Ten days passed in this manner. Everyday he used to give us some dinars. Then one day he asked me about my profession. When I told him that I was an expert trader, he gave me some money and told me to start a business. After conducting the business for some months, I offered him his share of the profits. He went into the other room and returned with the moneybag that I had lost years ago. I was overjoyed to see it and became unconscious due to the excitement. I thanked Allah and returned to my native village. Gradually my economic conditions began to change and once more I was a rich man.
" It may be that you dislike a thing while it is good for you, maybe that you love a thing while it is evil for you."
(Surah Baqarah 2:216).
"Allah brings about ease after difficulty."
(Surah Talaq 65:7)
Cure for Hopelessness in Difficult Times
If a person is involved in worldly problems he should turn towards two realities. Firstly, this world is a place of test and trial for everyone. There is no one who could escape its clutches. Secondly, one must look at the conditions of people who are worse off than us. In this way one can get peace and solace by comparing ones condition with that of others. Even in the greatest calamities, we should continue to rely upon the Mercy of Allah. Many a people of the past had been afflicted with tribulations with no relief in sight. But the Merciful Allah gave them success. In the book "Faraj Baad as Shiddah" the respected author, Husain bin Saeed Dabistani has recorded more than 500 incidents where people, surrounded by troubles from all sides were given relief by Allah after all hopes were shattered. Further we ourselves witness many cases where the invocations and Sadaqah of the religious personalities help the people out of difficult situations. In the same book there is an incident where a resident of Madinah says, "I was rich and had all the good things in life. Eventually I became poor and destitute. So I went to Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) and told him of my problems. He expressed pity upon my condition and recited the following couplets for my sake, "If you fall into difficult times do not be impatient. Because for a long time you have experienced comfort.
Then after every discomfort is comfort and consolation. And the saying of Allah is the most truthful. 'So do not despair, certainly despair is disbelief.' Allah may enrich you in a short while. After that do not forget your Lord. Certainly Allah fulfills His promise. If the intellect had the capacity to produce food the wealth of the world would be only with the intellectuals. Beware, do not lose hope when you face calamities. Behind the curtains are concealed astounding candles (of hope)."
The narrator says, "When I heard these lines my grief changed into happiness and hopelessness turned into optimism. Very soon the doors of Mercy opened upon me and my bad times changed for the good."
A Reminder
This book relates from the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) that to ward off calamities this Quranic verse should be recited.
"There is no God but Thou, glory be to Thee, surely I am of those who make themselves to suffer loss." (Surah Anbiya 21:87) "Allah is my Lord, and I do not associate him with anything."
We should remember that despair is the worst of the sins, because it implies that the connection between Allah and his creature has been severed. It signifies turning away from the Divine nature. Because even if an iota of belief remains in a person's heart, he could not severe relations with his Nourisher and Cherisher. It may be that sometimes a sort of hopelessness pervades his imagination but he soon recovers and repents of his sin.
Every Sin is Pardonable
According to the verse of the Holy Quran and Mutawatir (widely related) traditions all the sins which man commits are pardonable if he repents sincerely. It is wrong to say that such a sin can never be pardoned. The Almighty Allah says in the Glorious Quran,
"And He it is who accepts repentance from His servants and pardons the evil deeds and He knows what you do."
(Surah Shura 42:25)
Allah has mentioned His names as:
1) Tawwabun (one who accepts Tawbah)
2) Gaffarun (one who pardons)
3) Ghafoorun (one who forgives totally)
4) Ghaaferuz Zanbe (Pardoner of sins)
5) Qaabelut Tawbah (one who accepts repentance)
Allah has given a general invitation to all the people to turn towards Him and seek forgiveness for their sins. If we study the meaning of the 54th verse of Surah Zumar we find that sinners have no cause to lose hope. This Ayat is also known as Ayat-e-Rehmat (The verse of Mercy).
"Say: O my servants! who have acted extravagantly against their own souls, do not despair of the Mercy of Allah ; Surely Allah forgives the blunders altogether; surely He is the Forgiving, the Merciful."
(Surah Zumar 39:53).
Unlimited Grace
A few points must be noted from the above verse.
Firstly, Allah says, 'O my servant' and not 'O sinners!' Even though he is addressing the sinners he addresses them as 'my servants'. So that the hopelessness of the servants may be transformed into hope in His Mercy.
Secondly, he says, "Who have acted extravagantly." This denotes a soft approach. Allah does not say 'O you who have acted blatantly,' So that the sinners may not lose hope of obtaining pardon.
Hopelessness is Haraam
The third point to be noted is that the Almighty Allah has told the sinners, "Do not despair of the Divine Mercy." The use of a negative term signifies the prohibition of hopelessness. Also it means that to lose hope regarding salvation is Haraam.
The fourth point is that Allah did not stop at this, He further adds, "Surely Allah forgives the faults altogether," signifying that the statement covers all the sins.
Fifth Point: The addition of the word 'altogether' at the end signifies that the statement includes all sins without any exception.
Sixth Point: The last point is that at the end of the verse, Allah repeats, "Surely He is the forgiving, the merciful," to stress upon the fact that Allah desires and wishes to forgive those who repent.
Repentance of the Killer of a Prophet is also Acceptable
Jabir Ibn Abdullah Ansari (r.a.) relates that a woman came to the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) and asked, "If a woman kills her child can she seek pardon?" The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) replied,
"By Allah in whose control is the life of Muhammad (s.a.w.s.) even if this woman has killed seventy Prophets and then feels remorse and repents and Allah is convinced of her sincerity and the truth of her statement, upon the condition that she does not repeat the sin, her repentance shall be accepted. And her sins would be pardoned. Surely Allah is oft forgiving and forgives, ever so beyond measure. Verily one who repents (sincerely) is; as if he has never committed that sin."
(Liyali Akhbaar)
Despair in the Acceptance of Prayers is Also Improper
If we pray to Allah for some worldly benefits or the Hereafter and our prayer is not answered it raises two noteworthy points. Firstly, we must know that Allah has promised to accept all prayers and Allah never goes back on His word.
As it is mentioned in the Holy book,
"And when My servants ask you concerning Me, then surely I am very near; I answer the prayer of the suppliant when he calls on Me."
(Surah Baqarah 2:186)
At another place Allah says,
"And your Lord says: Call upon Me, I will answer you."
(Surah Momin 40:60)
The second point is that due to His unlimited wisdom He may delay the acceptance of some prayer. So if we do not get immediate gratification we should not lose hope of having our prayers accepted.
Prayers May Not Be Accepted Due to Sins
Sometimes the sins of a person come in the way of the acceptance of his prayers. At other times Allah may delay the acceptance due to some hidden wisdom. This would compel the person to repeat his prayers and thus he would be entitled for additional sawaab. The opportunity to invocate is itself a blessing of Allah.
Another possibility is that Allah wishes to hear the entreaties of His creature many a times before He fulfills his wishes.
Delay in the Acceptance of Prayers Causes Nearness to Allah
Sometimes there is a delay in the acceptance of prayers because, to supplicate Allah continuously is the best of worship. It is the Mercy of Allah that he may want us to continue to pray to Him. It is a means of seeking nearness to Him. For whomsoever He wishes good, He gives him the Tawfeeq of supplicating Him by delaying the acceptance of his prayers.
Allama Majlisi (r.a.) writes in the book 'Hayatul Qulub' that Imam Muhammad Baqir (a.s.) says in a reliable tradition, "Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) used to visit the populated cities and the desolate forests so that he could derive lessons from the creatures of Allah. One day he saw a worshipper busy in prayers. His dress was made of fur and the surroundings filled with his intonation. Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) was astonished at his appearance. He went towards him, sat down and waited for him to conclude his prayers. When he finished his prayers, Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) said, "I appreciate your way and want to befriend you. Tell me where do you stay so that I could come to meet you whenever I want." He said, "You will not be able to travel on my path."
"Why?"
"I walk on the surface of the water."
Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) said, "The Almighty Allah who has given you the capacity to walk on water, can also enable me to do so. Come, arise, today I shall spend the night with you at your residence.
When they reached the bank of the river the man uttered "Bismillah" and stepped in the river and was soon on the other side of it. Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) also recited Bismillah and crossed the river. This man was astounded. Then both of them entered his house.
Ibrahim (a.s.) asked him, "Which is the most difficult day?" He replied, "The day Allah will reward and punish all His creatures according to their deeds." Ibrahim (a.s.) said, "Let us together pray that Allah may protect us from the hardships of this day."
According to another report Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) said, "Let us pray together for the sinful believers." The worshipper said, "I will not participate in this prayer because I have been praying for something for the past thirty years and till date it has not been fulfilled, so there is no scope in praying for something else."
Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) said, "O worshipper! when Allah holds a creature dear He delays the acceptance of his prayers so that he may continue to plead and supplicate Him. On the other hand when He dislikes a person He answers his prayers immediately or creates hopelessness in his heart so that he would stop praying."
Then he asked the worshipper about his prayer which has not been accepted till then. He said, "One day I was busy in my prayers when I saw a handsome boy grazing a herd of sheep and goats. I asked him whose animals were those. He said they belonged to him. Then I asked him who he was. He said that he was the son of Khalilullah (Friend of Allah) Ibrahim (a.s.) and that his name was Ismail. At that moment I prayed to Allah to let me see my 'Khalil' Ibrahim (a.s.)." Ibrahim (a.s.) said, "Now your prayer has been answered. I am that Ibrahim (a.s.)." The worshipper became extremely overjoyed and embraced Ibrahim (a.s.). He kissed his head, eyes and hands and thanked the Almighty Allah with sincerity. After this both of them together prayed for the believing men and women.
In the tradition from Imam Reza (a.s.) where he has listed the Greater Sins, despondence is mentioned after despair (Yaas). Qunut (despondence) is described as the condition where one's heart loses hope of Allah's Mercy and that person does not even dislike the hopelessness. According to the religious scholars the difference between Yaas and Qunut is that the term 'Yaas' is used in general cases and 'Qunut' in special cases. It means that 'Yaas' describes the internal condition of one's heart. When this internal hopelessness intensifies to a degree whereby its effect becomes manifest outwardly and seem obvious to the common people, it is called 'Qunut'.
In short whoever expresses hopelessness by his speech or actions is actually a victim of 'Qunut'.
Hopelessness in Dua is Yaas
Many scholars believe that to discontinue invocation is a sign of despair. The hopeless person believes that he will not reach his destination through dua.
'Qunut' means that one accuses Allah of not being merciful and for not accepting his repentance. He thinks that whatever difficulties he suffers, are the retribution of his sins. Thus Imam Sajjad (a.s.) says in the 39th Dua of Sahifa-e-Sajjadiyah, "I neither despair of Your Mercy nor am I in despondence regarding you. But I am aggrieved because my good deeds are less in number and bad deeds numerous. Otherwise Your position is so high that not a single creature turns away dejected from you."
There is no doubt that despondence with regard to Allah is a Greater Sin. It is one of the characteristics of the polytheists and hypocrites as mentioned by Allah in Surah Fath.
"And (that) He may punish the hypocritical men and the hypocritical women, and the polytheistic men and the polytheistic women, the entertainers of evil thoughts about Allah..."
(Surah Fath 48:6)
Skepticism Invites Punishment
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) announced from the pulpit
"By Allah who has no partner, He does not deprive any of the people from the blessings of this world and the hereafter. But he should not harbour doubts (about Him). He should have hope in Him and possess good morals. He should refrain from backbiting about the believers. I swear by Allah Who is the One and without partners, He does not punish a believer after he had repented and asked for forgiveness. Except those who are skeptical about Allah and lack in hope, have evil behaviour and indulge in backbiting about the believers. I swear by Allah except Whom no one is fit to be worshipped. When someone expresses reliance and trust in Allah; Allah who is extremely graceful, will not deem it fit to order anything contrary to the faith that the believer has reposed in him. Then you must have good thoughts regarding Allah and must always depend upon Him."
(Al Kafi)
Hope For Forgiveness and the Acceptance of Dua
Having good thoughts about Allah means that one should have the conviction that if he repents for a sin, Allah would forgive him. If he invocates, his prayer would be answered. If he does a good action, it is certain that Allah would accept it and reward him for the same. To hope in salvation is beneficial, and it is obligatory. However to hope for rewards without performing good actions is ignorance and conceit.
Hopelessness in the Affairs of This World and the Hereafter
Some scholars of religion explain that the detecting feature of 'Qunut' and 'Yaas' is that 'Qunut' denotes hopelessness with regard to the worldly blessings.
The Holy Quran says concerning this,
"And He it is who sends down rain after they have despaired, and He unfolds His Mercy; and He is the Guardian, the Praised One."
(Surah Shura 42:28)
Concerning 'Yaas' the scholars maintain that it is with regard to the affairs of the Hereafter, as mentioned in the verse:
"...indeed they despair of the Hereafter..."
(Surah Mumtahena 60:13)
Qunut is Worse Than Yaas
To be despondent of Allah's Mercy results in the person being deprived of eternal blessings, because 'Qunut' causes the severance of the relation between the creature and Allah. The cause for this despondence is the extinguishing of the original flame of creation that had been alive in his heart. Even if a miniature of the light had remained, he would not have lost hope completely. It is possible that he may be involved in vain pursuits. If that is so then he has receded into the age of ignorance from the Mercy of Allah. But 'Yaas' denotes that the connection between the creature and Allah still remains even though separated by the curtain of sins. But behind the curtain the light of the original nature endures. He still believes in some connection with Allah. In such a case the dividing curtain could be removed.
'Yaas' can be forgiven but 'Qunut' does not deserve forgiveness. Thus 'Qunut' is included in the title of Shirk and becomes the greatest danger for man. (Quoted from Tafsir Ruhul Bayan)
Heedlessness to Allah's Anger and Retribution
One of the Greater Sins is a total disregard for Divine punishment. The person is fearless of the unseen retribution and scoffs at the idea of being punished for his actions. He lives blissfully in a world of material comforts and does not realise that he is fettered down by his sins. This is a Greater Sin. The Holy Imams, Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.), Imam Musa Kazim (a.s.) and Imam Reza (a.s.) have classified the fearlessness of Allah's punishment among the Greater Sins. The Qur'an announces:
"What! do the people of the towns then feel secure from Our punishment coming to them by night while they are asleep?"
(Surah Araf 7:97)
"What! do the people of the towns feel secure from Our punishment coming to them in the morning while they play?"
(Surah Araf 7:98)
"What! do they feel secure from Allah's plan? But none feels secure from Allah's plan except the people who shall perish."
(Surah Araf 7:99)
These three verses clearly prohibit the fearlessness of the punishment of Allah. The last verse mentions that those who do not fear Allah's punishment would be losers in the hereafter. Divine retribution will be their lot on the Day of Judgement, as will be the fate of the unbelievers and the non-repentant sinners.
It is clear from the Quran that to remain heedless of Allah's plan is a Greater Sin. Hence carelessness about the punishment and warnings of Allah is equivalent to disregard of His orders and prohibitions and an abject ignorance of His Supremacy. How can a lowly and insignificant being, now dare to oppose the Lord of the two worlds. This heedlessness and disregard is a Greater Sin that does not merit pardon, except that the sinner feels remorse and asks for forgiveness. It would emerge from the above discussion that whether a sin is pardonable or not depends more on the attitude of the sinner, rather than the sin itself. If in the innermost recesses of his heart, the transgressor is fearful of Allah, he is deserving of forgiveness, but if he is brazenly fearless of Allah's punishment, he is most unfit for pardon and mercy.
The plan of Allah means a sudden punishment that descends upon the sinners, as mentioned in the Divine book,
"Does man think that he is to be left to wander without an aim?"
(Surah Qiyamat 75:36)
'Imla'- Respite
'Allah's plan' includes 'Imla'. From the time Allah created man it has been a Divine practice that the thankless ones and the sinners should not be punished for their sins immediately. Rather they are given a long respite. Since everyone is prone to sin except the Infallibles, if each one were to be punished for their misdeeds immediately, not a single person would remain on the face of the earth. Allah has stated in the Holy Qur'an,
"And if Allah had destroyed men for their inequity, He would not leave on the earth a single creature, but He respites them till an appointed time..."
(Surah Nahl 16:61)
Besides, Imla proves to be the Grace of Allah for the pious. It gives them time to reflect upon their behaviour, realise their mistakes, repent, and make a firm intention not to repeat their sins. Allah's indulgence thus helps them to achieve the good in this world and the hereafter. On the other hand indulgence shown to unrepentant sinners only makes them heedless of the fact that eventually they will be accountable for their deeds. They continue to commit one sin upon another and when their corruption reaches a limit, a sudden punishment descends upon them.
"And I grant them respite; surely My scheme is effective."
(Surah Araf 7:183)
Disbelievers and sinners leading successful and comfortable lives may conceitedly feel that their capabilities have brought them success but in reality all that they have is a form of punishment from Allah and a sort of retribution which is referred to as 'the Plan of Allah."
Respite for the Wrong Doers
The Glorious Quran quotes thus,
"And let not those who disbelieve think that Our granting them respite is better for their souls; We grant them respite only that they may add to their sins; and they shall have a disgraceful chastisement."
(Surah Aale Imran 3:178)
Imam Reza (a.s.) said,
"By Allah, they have not been punished with anything more severe than Imla (respite)." (Safinatun Behaar)
Imam Sajjad (a.s.) has mentioned in Dua-e-Makarimul Akhlaq:
"(O Allah). Give me such a life that my (long) life is spent in obedience to you. And when my life becomes a field of Satan take away my soul towards you (before I become eligible for Divine retribution)."
Istedraaj (Drawing Near)
Istedraaj is also included in Allah's plan. At times the respite granted by Allah also includes a new blessing. Allah bestows His bounties upon a person who has sinned so that he may feel ashamed of himself and make amends. Instead, the person often develops confidence and blatantly commits more sins. Such unfortunate people are mentioned in the following verse of Quran:
"And (as to) those who reject Our communications, We draw them near (to destruction) by degrees from whence they know not."
(Surah Araf 7:182)
It is recorded in Safinatul Behaar, "When Allah wishes good for a person and he commits a sin, Allah involves him in difficulties so that he may become aware that the cause of his problems is his own sin. He can then repent for it (immediately). When Allah wishes to punish a person who commits a sin, He gives him a new form of blessing so that he may be dazzled by the blessing and ignore repentance. This is what Allah means in the Ayat (quoted above)."
Istedraaj denotes failure to repent
When Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) was asked the meaning of "Istedraaj" he replied:
"When a person commits a sin he is given respite and a new blessing, then when he fails to repent he is slowly led towards destruction; about which he is heedless. This is known as Istedraj and 'Allah's Plan."
(Wasaelush Shia)
It is related from Amirul Momineen (a.s.) that he said:
"Certainly, those who are given an increase in wealth and property by Allah, should not think anything but that it is Istedraaj. They should not be fearless (of Allah's plan). Because calm precedes storm."
(Behaarul Anwaar)
Fearlessness of Allah's Plan
Allah possesses two kinds of qualities, the Jamali (good) and Jalali (severe). Example of Jamali qualities are His being Rahman (Beneficent), Raheem (Merciful), Kareem (Generous), Haleem (Magnanimous), Shakoor (Thankful), Ghafoor (one who forgives).
The Jalali qualities are His being Jabbar (Mighty), Qahhar (One who punishes), Muntaqim (One who retributes), Muzallil (One who degrades), Mutakabbir (Proud) and Shadeedul Iqab (Severe in punishing). Hence Allah informs of His good qualities and then warns of His Severity:
"Inform My servants that I am the Forgiving, The Merciful, and that My punishment - that is the painful punishment."
(Surah Hujarat 49:50)
Elsewhere Allah says,
"The Forgiver of faults and the Acceptor of repentance, severe to punish, Lord of bounty."
(Surah Momin 40:3)
Thus Allah is the most Merciful of the mercifuls in the matter of forgiveness and also the most severe in retribution.
Fear and Hope Are the Signs of Marefat
One who recognizes the boundless expanse of Allah's Mercy is bound to have great hopes; if he has repented, his sins will be forgiven, if he has worshipped Allah, his invocation will be accepted and Allah in His generosity will let him have the maximum benefits. Allah is known to be the 'Forgiver of sins' and 'Acceptor of prayers'. In the same way the knowledge of the severity of Allah's chastisement for every sin will make one tremble with fear. The fear of Allah inspires a person with Tawfeeq that insulates him from transgressing the bounds of prohibitions, and compels him towards sincere repentance. When we are in the throes of temptation to commit an aggression, we have to be extremely cautious not to give in. It may so happen that the particular sin we are about to commit will seal our fate and deprive us forever, of Allah's Mercy and forgiveness. It is narrated from Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.):
"One who intends to commit a sin (should control his selfish desires and) must not put it to practice. Certainly when (sometimes) a person commits a sin, Allah dislikes him and says: "By My Honour and Greatness I will not forgive you after this."
(Al Kafi)
Since there is a possibility that a sin may not be eligible for pardon, it is extremely important that we keep ourselves protected from every sin; be it big or small. In fact the sins which do not deserve to be pardoned are regarded as insignificant by the one who commits them.
Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) states:
"You must fear the small sins, for they are not pardoned."
The narrator asked, "What is meant by 'small'?" Imam replied;
"A person commits a sin which he considers to be insignificant and says, "I deserve admiration for I have not committed a sin as serious as that of the other person."
(Al Kafi)
Speech and Action Should Be Guarded By Divine Fear and Hope
Even if the sinner repents for his sins, he should continue to be fearful. It may be that his repentance has not fulfilled the necessary conditions. For example, he have made an intention of not repeating a sin, but later he does not remain firm upon it. We should therefore continue to live between fear and hope till the end of our lives, hoping for Allah's rewards for our good deeds and dreading the accountability of our sins committed knowingly or unintentionally.
One Must Fear the Acceptance of His Prayers
If a prayer is not accepted it should be feared that (maybe) it is because of our sins. And if it is granted, it may be that one is so disliked by Allah that He could not stand his invocation again and again and has thus accepted his prayers immediately.
Separation is the Most Painful Experience
If we are able to achieve success, be it material, intellectual or even spiritual, at all times we should be aware that our achievements are a Grace and Mercy from Allah, and not the result of our own capabilities. Thankfulness to Allah, alone earns Allah's approval. Pride and ingratitude will forever separate us from our Creator and this is the worst of the punishments.
Amirul Momineen Ali (a.s.) says in Dua-e-Kumail:
Suppose, My Lord! My Master! My Cherisher! I am able to endure your punishment, how can I endure separation from Thee. Suppose I am able to endure the heat of Thy fire, how can I endure not gazing upon Thy generosity.
How Should We Remain Till the End of our Lives
We should be very apprehensive and anxious about our end. We have seen good and pious people who, in the final stages of their lives, turned to evil. Let us implore the Merciful Lord to protect our faith, and let us die as believers.
"Therefore take a lesson, O you who have eyes!"
(Surah Hashr:2)
Everyone Shall Be Tested
We must also be fearful of the difficult test that we have to undergo. All the believers who have attained a high position have been in constant dread of failure when put to test. The respected Book of Allah has said:
"Do men think that they will be left alone on saying, 'We believe' and not be tried?"
(Surah Ankaboot:2)
Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) and the Fire
When Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) was tied to a catapult to be thrown into the blazing fire he said, "Allah is sufficient for me." When Ibrahim (a.s.) claimed that Allah's help was sufficient for him, and he did not need help from anyone else, Allah decided to test him and sent Jibraeel, who asked Ibrahim (a.s.) if he had any kind of wish so that it may be fulfilled. Ibrahim (a.s.) replied, "I do have a wish but not from you." Jibraeel said: "It is correct but express your wish to the one in whom you repose hope." Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) replied: "He is aware of my condition hence there is no need for me to say it verbally."
Successful When Tested
Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) deserves admiration. In the most difficult circumstances he refrained from showing his want, even to the trustworthy angel of revelation Jibraeel (a.s.). Thus he emerged successful from the most severe test. Hence the Divine verse says:
"And (of) Ibrahim who fulfilled (the commandments)."
(Surah Najm 53:37)
We must also not be heedless of the Divine test nor should we be fearless of Divine retribution. Even the most near ones to Allah, the angels, the prophets and the messengers were not careless in this regard. Especially in times of difficulties and calamities we have to be extra careful; constantly imploring Allah to prevent us from overstepping the boundaries prohibited by Him. Imam Sajjad (a.s.) says in the beginning of Dua-e-Abu Hamza Thumali:
"Do not punish my sins by letting me to be heedless of your retribution."
Tawfeeq is From Allah
Let it be very clear to us that whatever good we are able to do, is only due to Tawfeeq from Allah and we have to be most humbly grateful to Allah for this tawfeeq. Thanklessness in the matter may result not only in the loss of such opportunities in the future but may even nullify the good already done, and bring us disgrace.
Wise People Fear Allah
Those who realise the Greatness and the Majesty of Allah in comparison to their own worthlessness are more fearful of Allah. Only those who realise how utterly dismal and worthless they themselves are and how exalted and Supreme is their Creator, are fearful of Allah.
The Holy Quran says:
"Those of His servants only who are possessed of knowledge fear Allah."
(Surah Fatir:28)
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) is reported to have said: "The fountain-head of wisdom is the fear of Allah."
(Wasaelush Shia)
The Prophet's (s.a.) Conversation With Umme Salma
Janabe Umme Salma says that she saw the Holy Prophet of Allah in a middle of the night standing in a corner of the house and entreating Allah: "O Allah! Whatever You have given me, do not take those blessings away. Never let me become the butt of criticism and jealousy of the enemies. O Allah! Never let me return to the vices from where You have extricated me. O Allah! Do not leave me (free) to myself even for a blink of the eye (for a moment)."
Umme Salma says: When I heard these words I began to weep uncontrollably. The Prophet asked the reason for my lamentation. I replied, "Why shouldn't I weep when you, who have attained such a high position , are invocating Allah in such a (humble) way?"
Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) said:
"Why should not I fear thus. When Allah left Hazrat Yunus (a.s.) on his own for a moment, what did happen." (That is, he remained in the belly of a whale).
(Behaarul Anwaar)
The Prophets (a.s.) and the Imams (a.s.) Were the Most Fearful
The Holy Quran commends the prophets in the following words:
"Surely they used to hasten, one with another, in deeds of goodness and to call upon Us, hoping and fearing; and they were humble before Us."
(Anbiya 21:90)
Regarding the Holy Ahlul Bayt (a.s.) the Divine words are:
"They fulfill vows and fear a day the evil of which shall be spreading far and wide."
(Surah Insan 76:7)
The fear of the Prophets and the Holy Imams, specially that of Ali (a.s.) is well-known. He used to lose consciousness due to the fear of Allah. Imam Zainul Abedeen (a.s.) expresses this fear most eloquently in the Duas of Sahifa-e-Sajjadiyah. If we are to record all such examples we shall be straying away from our aim. We hope that the examples given so far will be sufficient for the intelligent.
A Believer Lives Between Fear and Hope
A believer lives in a state of anxiety and optimism, (as prescribed by the traditions) He is fearful of Divine punishment and yet hopeful of Divine Mercy. The Holy Quran says:
"It is only the Shaitan that causes you to fear from his friends, but do not fear them, and fear Me if you are believers."
(Aale Imran 3:175)
This type of fear is obligatory for every Muslim. The fear which refrains him from even approaching sins. Allah, the Almighty addresses his Prophet (s.a.w.s.) in the Quranic Ayat,
"Say: Surely I fear, if I disobey my Lord, the chastisement of a grievous day."
(Surah Anam 6:15).
Hope Should Not Cause Arrogance
The trust and hope we repose in Allah's Mercy and generosity will certainly bring us additional bounties. But this trust should not assume proportions that make us feel confident and arrogant that we think, we shall not be punished. As is mentioned in Quran,
"Let not the arch-deceiver (Satan) deceive you respecting Allah."
(Surah Fatir 35:5)
Allah tells the polytheists in Surah Hadid,
"...the arch-deceiver (Satan) deceived you about Allah."
(Surah Hadid 57:14)
The exegesis of this ayat as recorded in "Minhajus Sadeqeen' is that Satan says, "Have complete faith in the magnanimity and the Mercy of Allah. He does not punish any one."
Hazrat Imam Muhammad al-Baqir (a.s.) said,
"There is no believer who does not possess two lights in his heart. One is the light of fear and the other, the light of hope. None of these is heavier than the other. Both are equal."
(Al Kafi)
Action of Man Depicts Hope and Fear
It is related from Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) that he said, "A believer cannot have belief till both fear and hope are present in him. Nor can he be called as fearful and hopeful till he makes it evident in his actions."
(Al Kafi)
Man's psyche should contain a perfect balance of fear and hope. It is related from Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.):
"Hakim Luqman (r.a) advised his son in his will. 'If your deeds equal the good deeds of all men and Jinns, together, you must expect that you may yet be punished by Him. And you must hope in Allah so much that even if you carry the burden of the total sins of men and jinns, and approach Allah for forgiveness, He will pardon you.'
(Al Kafi)
A Lesson
Now I invite the readers to contemplate on this. Do we have true hope and real fear of Allah?
If we truly dread Allah's punishment then why are we not fearful of our sins?
Why is there a sluggishness in following the commands of the Masoomeen (a.s.)? If we truly regard ourselves to be desiring of Divine Mercy, why do we not strive for the goal? Why are our actions not directed towards absolute obedience and worship?
Yes, we do have genuine fear and hope with regard to the worldly affairs. This is evident in the excessive care, concern and caution we exercise to preserve our physical safety and material assets. Any sign of losing them, and we get restless till the danger is averted. If a worldly object is our goal we strive for it tirelessly and are not negligent for a moment.
By Allah! Let us look at the amount of efforts we put in our worldly affairsand honestly admit to ourselves whether we work even a fraction of it for the Hereafter. We most certainly do not. So let us resolve to divert some of our energies towards the fear and hope of the hereafter. If a sin has been committed, let us continuously feel remorse and weep for forgiveness, forgetting luxury and comforts, repenting till our last moment when we hear the good news.
"(As for) those who say: Our Lord is Allah, then continue in the right way, the angels descend upon them, saying: Fear not, nor be grieved, and receive good news of the Garden which you were promised."
(Surah Ha Mim 41:30)
Let us realise that it is obligatory for the believers to remain in fear of Allah till the end of their lives.
Between Two Fears
Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) said,
"A believer is always between two fears. One is the fear of his past sins, (so) he does not know as to how Allah would deal with him. Secondly he fears until the end of his life and does not know the sins that might be committed by him, causing his destruction. The believer does not forgo his fear for his whole life, and his affairs do not improve without fear."
(Al Kafi)
One Must Strive for the Hereafter
We must understand that Allah has guaranteed sustenance for us in this world. The Quran says,
"And there is no animal in the earth but on Allah is the sustenance of it... " (Surah Hud 11:6)
However the success of the hereafter depends upon the efforts of man. As Allah says,
"And that man shall have nothing but what he strives for; And that his striving shall soon be seen."
(Surah Najm 53:39-40)
Claim Must Be Substantiated By Action
Amirul Momineen Ali (a.s.) says in Nahjul Balagha:
"One who claims (verbally) and says that I am hopeful of the Mercy of Allah, is a liar. By Allah if his claim is genuine then why is his sincerity not reflected in his actions."
It is true that hope and fear are inner feelings, but they are manifested in one's actions. Hence, Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) says,
"The Proof of fear is flight and the proof of hope is the effort to come near."
So, those who do not resort to flight from the sins prove that they do not have fear. Similarly, those who do not strive for the hereafter, make it evident that they do not have any hope in the bounties of Allah. Such people claim only verbally that Allah is Most Merciful. Actually, Satan has deceived them, and speaks through their tongue. Why is it that they do not just claim Allah to be generous for worldly benefits. Rather, they strive hard to procure these but are content to claim that Allah is Merciful for the Hereafter, and feel very secure in that thought without making any effort to strive for the Hereafter.
Fear Allah As If You Can See Him
Hazrat Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) has stated,
"Allah has to be feared as if you see Him with your own eyes. Because even if you can't see Him, He is surely watching you. If you think that He is not watching you, you are a Kafir. However if you know that He is watching you and still commit sins, it means that you have regarded Him as an insignificant viewer."
(Al Kafi)
If any mortal were to see us committing a sin we would feel ashamed and refrain from such a behaviour. But its a pity that we disregard the All-seeing Almighty and indulge in sins, unabashed.
The Perfect Example
One look at the life of Amirul Momineen Ali (a.s.) will make the best of us hang our heads in shame. We would emerge to be the most despicable and wretched creatures, when judged in the light of his excellence.
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) says:
"A stroke of Ali (a.s.) on the day of Khandaq (battle of Ahzaab) is superior to the total worship of men and jinns."
(Behaarul Anwaar)
Ali (a.s.), inspite of his exalted position, is all humility when he addresses his Lord. Not an iota of significance does he attach to his outstanding achievements. They are all a Mercy from his Creator. In himself, he sees only shortcomings, faults and weaknesses for which he weeps and prays till he becomes unconscious. Abu Darda relates that I heard Ali (a.s.) reciting in a disconsolate voice: "O my Lord, there is no doubt that I have spent a good part of my life in Your disobedience.1 Still I do not hope for forgiveness from anyone but You. Nor do I intend to please anyone except You. O my real Master when I think of Your Mercy, the weight of my sins begins to feel light. But when I remember Your severity, the load of the difficulties crush me."
Abu Darda says, 'When there was a silence after this, I moved forward and saw that Ali (a.s.) had fallen unconscious. When I shook his arm, it seemed lifeless. I thought that my master Ali (a.s.) has passed away.'
Similarly Zorara says, 'Once I saw Ali (a.s.) in the last part of a dark night. He was holding his beard and pleading in a sorrowful voice: 'O! The provisions for the journey are less and the distance vast. The way is horrifying and the path dangerous.'
Ali (a.s.) says in Dua-e-Kumail:
"O Allah the trials have increased and my condition has deteriorated and my good deeds are very few."
The Personality of Ali (a.s.) is a Model For Us
Like his fear, the hope of Ali (a.s.) is also prominent. Since his birth upto the last moments of his life he remained engrossed in worship and obedience. He did not forgo worship even for a single moment. Sometimes he used to pray a thousand rakats of prayers in a day. Throughout his life, he fasted the whole of the month of Shabaan. He never missed the midnight prayers. Even in the night of the battle of Siffin, which is known as the coldest of the nights he offered his midnight prayers. For three continuous days he broke his fast with water. He gave his share of bread to the poor, the needy and the orphans. He gave in charity the proceeds of the sale of the garden that he had planted with his own hands. A detailed chapter of Behaarul Anwaar deals with the endowments of Ali (a.s.) and his charity. A few examples are quoted below:
An Excerpt From the Will of Ali (a.s.)
The will of Ali (a.s.) is phrased in the following manner:
"This writing is that in which we have willed regarding one's belongings. The slave of Allah, Ali hopes that Allah shall reward him for this by Heaven and shall protect him from the fire of the Hell on the day when the faces of some people would be white and the others black. Whatever property I own in 'Yambao' and its suburbs, I leave all of it as an endowment to achieve the happiness of Allah."
Inspite of excelling in good deeds and worship, while returning from a battle, he was seen exclaiming,
"Certainly, the best deed of a man is to die a martyr. I fear I may not get a chance to achieve martyrdom."
At last the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) informed him:
"O Ali! Your end shall be martyrdom."
We Shall Follow Ali (a.s.)
We may think that it is not possible for sinners like us to come up to the level of a lofty personality like Ali (a.s.) in terms of piety and spiritual realisation.
In reply to this we can say that, though it is not possible for us to reach that stage we can at least try to follow his commands as much as possible. For example, if a child sees a shining cobra, it is possible that he may try to catch it and risk being bitten to death?
Let us suppose the child is accompanied by his father. In such a situation the father who is aware of the poisonous qualities of the cobra will shout warnings and move forward to rescue the child.
O the heedless one! Is not Ali (a.s.) your spiritual father and the virtual guide? Are you not the claimant of his love and Wilayat. If your reply is positive then you must strive to follow and imitate your master as much as possible. The hardships and the punishments of the Day of Judgement make one shudder with horror and one cannot be complacent about the preparations of this last journey. If you are a true Shia of Ali (a.s.) then he is the best model for you. Ali (a.s.) has himself said,
"You cannot imitate me entirely, but you can imitate (to some extent) and follow us."
"Our Shias are only those who follow us."
Warning of the Leader
The leader of the caravan issues warning regarding the dangers of the journey and advises his followers to make all the necessary provisions for the perils and the wild animals they would encounter. Every person will be responsible for himself. Saying this he himself busies himself in preparations. The fear of the impending journey makes him terror-stricken.
Seeing their leader in this condition the followers respond by feeling a similar concern for the journey and its preparations.
Let us not be complacent and heedless, and waste precious moments. Let us follow our Imam (a.s.) faithfully, so that we do not have to face remorse on the Day of Judgement.
The Chief of the Caravan is Terror-Stricken
O! the caravans of piety and belief. The leader of your caravan, Ali ibn Abi Talib (a.s.) is extremely afraid of the pitfalls of the last journey. He has issued clear warnings regarding the dangers. Every night he announced at the Masjid-e-Kufa,
"Travellers! may Allah have Mercy upon you. Pack up the provisions for your journey and be prepared. Certainly you have in your path deep ravines and terrible dangers. There is no alternative but to traverse this path."
After this he used to say,
"It is a pity! The provisions are meagre and the journey extremely long and the destination, great."
(Nahjul Balagha)
It is truly deplorable that our involvement in worldly affairs has created a wide unsurmountable gap between us and our Imam (a.s.). We have been completely cut off from his virtuous life and perfect morals. May Allah protect us from departing His influence to follow the misguidance of Satan. Certain sins cause us to be deprived of the Wilayat of Allah and love of Ahlul Bayt (a.s.) and lead us to the wilayat of Satan. After this we come under the control of Satan who rules us totally. Let us take refuge with Allah from such a doom.
Insulting a Believer Expels One From Wilayat
Hazrat Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) said:
"If a person slanders a believer to disclose his faults to the public, or to insult him, Allah expels him from His Wilayat and leaves him to the Wilayat of Satan."
(Al Kafi)
"Like the Satan when he says to man: Disbelieve, but when he disbelieves, he says: I am surely clear of you; surely I fear Allah, the Lord of the worlds."
(Surah Hashr 59:16)
Murder
The fifth Greater Sin is the murder of that person whose execution has not been ordered by Allah and the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.). Traditions which confirm that murder is a Greater Sin have already been mentioned at the beginning. Moreover the verses of the Holy Quran mention clearly the Divine punishment for the murderers.
"And whoever kills a believer intentionally, his punishment is Hell; he shall abide in it, and Allah will send His wrath on him and curse him and prepare for him a painful chastisement."
(Surah Nisa 4:93)
The fifth Greater Sin is the murder of that person whose execution has not been ordered by Allah and the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.). Traditions which confirm that murder is a Greater Sin have already been mentioned at the beginning. Moreover the verses of the Holy Quran mention clearly the Divine punishment for the murderers.
Five types of punishments have been ordained for those who kill the believers. First, Hell; Second, Eternal abode in Hell; Third, involvement in the Divine wrath; Fourth, being the accursed by Allah; Fifth, the Great Chastisement.
Permanent Chastisement is Exclusively For unbelievers
One of the beliefs of the Shia Ithna Ashari school of thought is that eternal punishment is only for the Kuffar (Unbelievers). In other words, if a person dies in belief, he will not linger under punishment forever, even if he has killed a believer (or someone else whose killing has been prohibited according to the Divine command), or even though he has committed other greater sins. Hence the verse mentioned above has been explained in various ways. One possible explanation is that: one becomes eligible for eternal punishment only if he murders the believer because of his Imaan (belief). If such is the case, then, the killer is indeed liable for everlasting chastisement, for he considered the murder of a Momin as Halaal, whereas it is Haraam. To consider a murder of a believer Haraam is an article of faith. Consequently one who does not have this belief is a Kafir.
The Life and Property of a Muslim are Protected
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) announced on the occasion of the Farewell Pilgrimage (Hajjatul Wida):
"O People! It is not permitted to kill the Muslims. Similarly to appropriate their property is not allowed. So do not be unjust upon yourselves and do not revert to disbelief after my death."
(Wasaelush Shia)
Another explanation of the afore-mentioned hadith is that "abide in Hell" denotes being under punishment for a very long period. It does not mean that the sinner will be involved in eternal chastisement.
One Murder is Equal to the Killing the Whole of Humanity
"Whoever slays a soul, unless it be for a manslaughter or for mischief in the land, it is as though he slew all men; and whoever keeps it alive, it is as though he kept alive all men."
(Surah Maidah 5:32)
All the believers are sons of Adam (a.s.) and brothers to one another. One who kills another person perpetrates a great evil and instigates a feeling of malice, revenge and hatred among people.
Suicide is Murder
The Almighty Allah says:
"....and do not kill ourselves; surely Allah is Merciful to you. And whoever does this aggressively and unjustly, We will soon cast him into Fire; and this is easy for Allah."
(Surah Nisa 4:29-30)
Allah prohibits the believers from suicide even in times of turmoil.
Enlivening the People
".....and whoever keeps it alive, it is as though he kept alive all men."
(Surah Maidah 5:32)
If one saves the life of a "protected soul" whose killing has been prohibited by religion, be it forgiving, or not avenging, or protecting him, it is as if he has given life to the whole humanity. By saving one person he has; in a sense; saved humanity.
Murder is the worst sin in the eyes of Allah and severe punishment has been prescribed for a killer. The opposite of this, that is, saving the life of a person is accordingly regarded as the greatest form of worship.
A Murderer Does Not Die a Muslim
The following tradition is indicative of the fact that murder is a Greater Sin.
Regarding the killing of a believer, Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) says:
At the time of his death the killer is told. 'Die as you wish, die as a Jew or a Christian or as a Magian.'
(Al Kafi)
Another tradition:
"A believer is free in the vast expanse of his belief till he colours his hands with the blood of a Momin."
Imam (a.s.) further says:
"One who kills a believer intentionally is deprived of the 'Tawfeeq' of repenting (for his sins)."
(Wasaelush Shia)
One Who Instigates a Murder is the Actual Killer
The third tradition, also from Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) says,
"The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) was told that a Muslim has been killed and his corpse is lying on the street. When the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) and his companions reached the site of the murder, he enquired as to who the killer was."
The people said, "We do not know." The Prophet was surprised,
"A person has been killed among the Muslims, and no one knows of his killer?"
"By the Almighty who appointed me with Prophethood, If all the creatures of the heavens and the earth participate in the murder of a Muslim and be pleased upon that, then Allah would surely involve them in punishment and send them all to Hell."
The lesson derived from this hadith is that there is no difference between the killer and those who support or co-operate with him.
Imam Muhammad al-Baqir (a.s.) has said,
"On the day of Qiyamat a person would be presented before Allah. He will be having a streak of blood (like one gets a cut while shaving). He will say,
'By Allah, I have not killed anyone. Not have I co-operated with anyone's murder.' Allah will say, 'Yes, but one day you spoke about a believer and your words caused him to be killed. Hence you are responsible for his murder.'"
Hazrat Imam Reza (a.s.) said,
"If someone is killed in the east and one who lives in the west is pleased upon this, then he is a partner in this murder."
(Wasaelush Shia)
Abortion is Haraam
It is Haraam to abort an unborn child. Like in the case of a murder, diyah (prescribed fine) has to be paid here too. There is no difference between a foetus and a full-grown man. Even if the killers are its own parents. If a woman takes medicine that causes abortion, she would be liable for the punishment of a murderer.
The penalty (diyah) for killing a 'protected soul' (Nafse Mohtaram) is one thousand misqal of gold.
If the killers are the parents themselves they do not inherit any part of diyah but the other relatives who are eligible for the inheritance are qualified for it.
To Abort a Foetus Intentionally is Haraam
It is evident from the foregoing discussion that human life is considered sacred by the Islamic Shariat. Nothing has been given so much importance like the one reserved for the 'protected soul' (Nafs-e-Mohtaram). So much so that the beginning point of the human life, that is, the fertilised ovum is also not to be wasted. Once conception has taken place, no abortion is allowed. The 'diyah' (penalty) for abortion is as follows:
If the fertilised ovum is aborted the 'diyah' is sixty misqal.
If bones have formed it is eighty misqal.
If an incomplete child is aborted whose features have become distinct but the soul not entered the body, the penalty is one hundred misqal.
If soul had entered it and it was a male child, diyah is one thousand misqal, and if female, it is five hundred misqal.
If a pregnant woman dies, it is necessary to remove the unborn child by operation. Any carelessness in this regard is 'Haraam'.
If due to carelessness the child dies, diyah is wajib upon the one who was responsible for the lapse.
Repenting For Murder
By way of repentance, a person who has committed a willful murder should surrender himself to the heir of the murdered person. The successors of the murdered person have a choice of either avenging the death or accepting the 'diyah'. That is, they can forgive him or kill him in retribution.
If the murderer is forgiven, three things become obligatory on him:
1) Freeing a slave
2) Feeding sixty poor people
3) Keeping sixty fasts
If freeing a slave is not allowed by the law, the other two penalties should be fulfilled.
Accidental and Intended Murder
Even in the case of an accidental murder the heirs of the victim are to be paid the 'diyah'. But they should forgive the killer.
Apart from this the three penalties should be imposed, that is, freeing a slave, feeding sixty people and fasting for sixty days.
Similarly cutting off a part of someone's body is a Greater Sin. Those who intend to study this subject in detail are requested to refer to the books of Jurisprudence.
Those Who Are Disobedient to Their Parents
The sixth Greater Sin is to be disobedient to one's parents as expressly mentioned in the traditions from the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) and the Pure Imams (a.s.). These have already been quoted in the first chapter. A tradition of the Prophet (s.a.w.s.) says that the greatest sins are shirk and to be disobedient to one's parents. The seriousness of disobedience to parents as a Greater sin can be gauged from the fact that the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) has mentioned it along with shirk which is the greatest of all Greater sins, and unforgiveable. "Aaq" is a sin, the punishment of which is promised in the Quran and the traditions.
The words of Hazrat Isa (a.s.) as quoted by the Quran are:
"And dutiful to my mother, and He has not made me insolent, unblessed."
(Surah Mariyam 19:32)
As Isa (a.s.) did not have a father, his mother is alone mentioned. In the same Surah, both the father and mother of Hazrat Yahya (a.s.) are mentioned.
Both the verses mention three characteristics of the disobedient child (Aaq-e-Waledain).
1) 'Jabbar' (insolent)
2) 'Shaqee' (unblessed)
3) 'Aasi' (disobedient)
Each of these negative qualities render one liable for severe punishment. Regarding 'Jabbar' (insolent) the Quran says:
"And they asked for judgement and every defiant opposer was disappointed. Hell is before him and he shall be given to drink of festering water: He will drink it little by little and will not be able to swallow it agreeably, and death will come to him from every quarter, but he shall not die; and there shall be vehement chastisement before him."
(Surah Ibrahim 14:15-17)
The one who is Shaqee will be punished as follows:
"So as to those who are 'Shaqee', they shall be in fire; for them shall be sighing and groaning in it; Abiding therein so long as the heavens and the earth survive, except as your Lord pleases."
(Surah Hud 11:106-107)
Those with the third characteristic, that is, those who are 'Aasi' will be dealt with severely by Allah.
"And whoever disobeys Allah and His Apostle and goes beyond His limits, He will cause him to enter fire, to abide in it, and he shall have an abasing chastisement."
(Surah Nisa 4:14)
Tradition Regarding Aaq-e-Waledain
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) says:
"Beware! Abstain from angering the parents. The fragrance of Paradise is perceived even at a distance of a thousand years, but those who are disobedient to parents and those who cut off ties with relatives will not be able to smell it."
(Wasaelush Shia).
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) also said.
"One who displeases the parents, (it is as if) he has displeased Allah. One who angers both his parents (it is as if) he has angered Allah."
Elsewhere, it is mentioned,
"One who hurts his parents, hurts me and one who hurts me has hurt Allah. And the one who hurts Allah is accursed."
(Mustadrakul Wasael)
The Prophet (s.a.w.s.) has also stated:
"Allah will not speak to three kinds of people on the Day of Qiyamat. Neither will He have mercy upon them, nor will He purify their sins. There is for them a horrible chastisement. The three types of people are the believers in destiny, the drunkards and those who disobeyed their parents."
(Al Kafi)
Aaq-e-Waledain is Not Eligible For Divine Forgiveness
The wretchedness of the Aaq-e-Waledain is sufficiently evident from the fact that the trustworthy Jibraeel (a.s.) has cursed him and said,
"One who is blessed with parents but does not fulfill their (his parent's) rights will not be forgiven (his sins) by Allah."
(Behaarul Anwaar)
When Jibraeel (a.s.) said this, the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) uttered, 'Amen'! Hazrat Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) said,
"Accursed, Accursed is the one who beats his parents. Accursed is the one who distresses his parents.
(Mustadrak)
Prayer is Not Accepted
Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) said,
"Allah will not accept the Namaz of the person who stares angrily at his parents. Even though they (parents) may be unjust."
A Young man is interceeded by the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.)
A young man was on his deathbed when the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) came, sat near him, and told him to recite two kalimas (Shahadatain). But the youth could not speak. The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) enquired if his mother was present? A woman sitting near his head said, "Yes, I am his mother."
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) asked, "Are your displeased with him?"
'Yes, O Prophet (s.a.w.s.), we have not spoken to each other since the last six years.'
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) asked this woman to forgive her son. Thus at the Prophet's instance she forgave his mistakes and was reconciled. At once the young man was able to recite the Kalima-e-Shahadat.
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) asked him,
"What do you see, at this moment." " O Prophet of Allah a dark and smelly man has got hold of me and is not leaving me."
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) told him to recite the following dua,
"Ya man Yaqbalul yaseera wa y'afo 'Anil Katheera Iqbal minnil Yaseera Wa 'Aafo 'Annil Katheera."
Then asked, "Now what do you see?" He replied, "A fair complexioned man, handsome and fragrant, is moving towards me."
The Holy Prophet said, "Keep repeating this dua." When the youth repeated this dua he said "O Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.s.) both of them have disappeared from my sight." After this the face of the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) was illuminated with joy. He said, "O Allah forgive the sins of this young man." Then the youth passed away.
(Behaarul Anwaar)
This tradition shows how difficult are the last moments of the Aaq-e-Waledain. He leaves this world in disbelief and remains, forever, in Divine punishment. The tutor of Kalima for this young man was the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.). In spite of this his tongue did not move till his mother forgive him. The blessings of the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) and the forgiveness of his mother brought salvation for this youth.
What is Aaq-e-Waledain?
Allama Majlisi (r.a.) writes in his commentary on Al Kafi:
Aaq-e-Waledain means that the son or the daughter cause disrespect to parents by speech or actions. Or they do not obey them in matters which are within reason and matters which are not in any way against religion.
Aaq-e-Waledain is absolutely Haraam. The books of traditions of both the Shias as well as the Sunnis validate this fact.
To look at the parents with anger is Aaq: To cause unhappiness to the parents results in Aaq. It is Haraam to take any step, which one is sure, will displease the parents.
Benevolence to Parents is Wajib
The verses of the Quran as well as the traditions of the infallible Imams (a.s.) not only prohibit displeasing and angering the parents, but also stress that benevolence towards them is Wajib.
A few examples of the Quranic Ayats are presented for the readers:
1) "And We have enjoined on man goodness to his parents."
(Surah Ankaboot 29:8)
2) "Be grateful to Me and both your parents..."
(Surah Luqman 31:14)
The above verse is specially worth noting for the fact that Allah has mentioned together gratefulness towards Himself and to the parents. Certainly thankfulness to Allah is Wajib, and in the same way it is Wajib for the children to be thankful to their parents.
3) "And your Lord has commanded that you shall not serve (any) but Him, and goodness to your parents. If either or both of them reach old age with you, say not to them (so much as) "Uff" nor chide them, and speak to them a generous word. And make yourself submissively gentle to them with compassion, and say: O my Lord! Have compassion on them, as they brought me up (when I was) little.
(Surah Bani Israel 17:23-24)
In this Ayat Allah has mentioned goodness to parents. In the same sentence He exhorts about service to Him. As service to Allah is Wajib, benevolence to parent is Wajib too.
When the Imam (a.s.) was asked to explain the meaning of the term "Bil Waledaine Ehsana" (and goodness to your parents), he said,
"Be good to your parents and if they are in need of something, procure it for them before they ask for it."
Then the meaning of the words, "Taqullahuma Qualan Kareema" (speak to them a generous word) was explained by the Imam (a.s.)
"If the parents beat you, say 'May Allah forgive you'. The phrase 'Wakhfiz Lahuma' (and make yourself submissively gentle to them) is elaborated by the Imam (a.s.):
"Do not look at them with distaste. Do not raise your voice above theirs. When you walk with them do not precede them. When you go to a gathering, do not sit before they do. Never keep your hand above theirs (while giving them something)."
Service to Parents is Better Than Jehad
Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) narrates that a young man presented himself to the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) and said that he wanted to participate in Jehad. The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) told him:
"Certainly, go for Jehad in the way of Allah. If your are killed you will be alive near Allah and be provided sustenance from Him. The recompense for your sacrifice would be with Allah. If you return alive your sins would be washed off as if your were a newborn child."
This man said: "O Prophet of Allah, my parents are alive and they are aged and have great expectations from me. They do not like me to be away from them."
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) said:
"If that is so, then stay behind to serve your parents. By Allah in whose hands is my life, to serve parents for a day and night is equal to a year of Jehad."
Another tradition from Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) says:
"Acquire your place in Heaven by serving your parents. If you are guilty of 'Aaq' then make Hell your abode."
Goodness to Parents is the Expiation of Sins
Goodness towards the parents is the expiation of various sins. It is related in a report that a man came to the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) and said, "O, Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.s.) there is not a single misdeed, that I have not committed. Is there repentance for me?" The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) told him,
"Go and do goodness to your father in order that your sins may be expiated."
When the man left the assembly the Prophet (s.a.w.s.) said,
"If his mother had been alive, it would have been more meritorious to do good to her."
Satisfaction of Parents is Satisfaction of Allah
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) has stated,
"In the happiness of parents lies the happiness of Allah and in their dissatisfaction is Allah's dissatisfaction."
(Behaarul Anwaar).
He (s.a.w.s.) further said,
"A person who is good to his parents will be just a grade below the prophets in Heaven. And the Aaq-e-Waledain will be only a grade higher than the Firons in Hell."
(Mustadrakul Wasael)
Angels Pray for Those Who do Good to Their Parents
Amirul Momineen Ali (a.s.) says,
"Benevolence to parents is the greatest of the religious obligations."
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) says that Allah has two Angels one of whom says, "O Allah! Protect those who do good to the parents." The other Angel prays, "O Allah! Destroy those people by retribution, with whom their parents are angry." Needless to say, the prayers of the Angels are always accepted by Allah.
The Material Effects of Aaq
The previous traditions mention the ill effects of 'Aaq-e-Waledain' in the hereafter. The following traditions describe the evil repercussions of Aaq-e-Waledain in this life.
The last of the Prophets (s.a.w.s.) says:
"There are three kinds of sins which are punished in this world, rather than being given respite till Qiyamat. The first is Aaq-e-Waledain. The second, injustice upon men and third, thanklessness for favour."
Hazrat Imam Muhammad al-Baqir (a.s.) stated,
"Secret charity cools down Divine anger while goodness to parents and benevolence to relatives, prolongs life."
(Behaarul Anwaar).
Another tradition says,
"Benevolence to parents and secret charity, ward off poverty, and both (these deeds) prolong life. Seventy types of death are kept away."
(Behaarul Anwaar)
"Those who assure me that they will be benevolent to parents and do good to the relatives, I will give them excess of wealth and a long life and assure them of being close among our group."
(Mustadrakul Wasael)
Hazrat Imam Naqi (a.s.) said,
"The displeasing of parents causes decrease in sustenance and degradation (also follows)."
Aaq-e-Waledain Cause Poverty and Misfortune
There was a young man from Madinah. His parents were very old. He never did any good towards them. He neglected them and did not expend any of his wealth for their well-being. After sometime he became a destitute and fell sick. His wretchedness and misery reached such excessive, that he became a pitiable character. The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) said,
"Those who cause hurt to their parents should derive lessons from the life of this man. See how his wealth and property has been taken away. His affluence and independence has changed to poverty and his health has turned into disease. Whatever position he was to get in Heaven, he has been deprived of due to his sins; in its place the fire of Hell has been prepared for him."
(Safinatul Bihar)
Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) narrates:
"When Hazrat Yaqoob (a.s.) went to Egypt to meet his son Hazrat Yusuf (a.s.), he (Yusuf a.s.) did not alight from his horse to pay respect to his father. Hazrat Jibraeel (a.s.) descended, and told Hazrat Yusuf (a.s.) to open his fist. As he did so, a light shot out from his palm and rose towards the sky. Hazrat Yusuf (a.s.) enquired, "What was this light which came out of my hand and shot to the sky?." Jibraeel (a.s.) replied, "The light of Prophethood has departed from your loins. You did not pay due respect to your father hence none of your descendants will get Prophethood." It is true that Hazrat Yusuf (a.s.) did not descend from his horse to pay respect to his father. However, this was not due to any feelings of pride and vanity. The Prophets are sinless and could never harbour such emotions. His intentions were merely to maintain his dignity as a King among his subjects."
Evil Consequences of Aaq-e-Waledain
Aaq-e-Waledain brings disgrace in the Hereafter, and goodness to parents brings honour and glory. As Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) has said,
"Those who wish an easy death should do good to the relatives and be kind to parents. When one does this, Allah will make easy the agony of death. In this world he will not face difficulties and poverty."
(Safinatun Bihar)
Prayers of the Parents Are Accepted Soon
The supplication of parents for the welfare of the child are quickly answered by Allah and in the same way their ill wish (curse) due to displeasing them also takes quick effect. Numerous traditions have been recorded in this connection. One such tradition is connected with the merits of Dua-e-Mashlool. It is said that a young man had lost the use of his right hand which was paralysed due to the curse of his father. After his father's death, the man prayed the entire night, continuously for a period of three years in Masjidul Haram. One day Hadhrat Ali (a.s.) saw him and took pity upon him. He taught him Dua-e-Mashlool. By the virtue of this Dua the young man was cured.
The Mother Has More Rights Than the Father
Goodness towards the mother is more rewarding. The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) emphasized that benevolence shown to the mother should be three times the magnitude of that shown towards the father. When he was asked as to which of the parents had more rights, he replied,
"Was it not your mother who suffered the birth pangs to give birth to you and provided you with your natural diet from her breasts? Indeed the rights of a mother far outweigh those of the father."
(Mustadrakul Wasael)
Rights of the Parents
Someone asked the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) about the rights of the father. He (s.a.w.s.) replied,
"He should be obeyed always, as long as he lives."
Then he was asked, "What is the right of the mother?". He answered,
"If the service to a mother equals the quantity of the particles of sand in the desert and the drops of rain on earth, it (this service) will not repay for a single day that she kept you in her womb."
(Mustadrakul Wasael)
A Young Man and His Invalid Mother
It is reported that a young man approached the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) and asked,
"O Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.s.), I have a mother who is an invalid. She cannot even move by herself. I carry her on my back and feed her with my hands. I also clean her excreta. Have I fulfilled her rights?"
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) replied,
"No. Because you have remained in the womb for a long period during which you derived your nourishment from her body. She was every busy in caring and protecting you at all costs. Inspite of such hardships she always wished a long life for you. But you are waiting for her to die so that you may relieved of the responsibility of taking care of her."
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) described the eminence of a mother's position in the following statement:
1) "If you are praying a mustahab prayer and your father calls you, do not break your prayer but if your mother calls, break the prayer."
Truly, this assigns a remarkably high status to a mother. The Prophet (s.a.w.s.) states,
"Paradise is at the feet of your mother."
Hence one need not go far in search of Paradise.
Be Good to Parents Even if They Are Kafirs
Whether the parents are believers and pious or Kafirs and sinful, goodness towards them is wajib. And 'Aaq-e-Waledain' is Haraam.
The verse of Surah Luqman says thus,
"And if they contend with you that you should associate with Me what you have no knowledge of, do not obey them, and keep company with them in this world kindly...".
(Surah Luqman 31:15)
Dua For Sunni Parents
Moammar Ibne Khallad asked Imam Reza (a.s.) whether one is allowed to pray for one's parents if they had not followed the truth and had not been Shia.
Imam Reza (a.s.) replied,
"If they are dead, pray for them and give Sadaqah on their behalf. If they are alive keep them happy."
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) says;
"Allah the Most High has sent me as the Mercy for the worlds, except to the 'Aaq' (of parents)."
Jabir Ibne Abdullah (r.a.) reports that someone asked Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.), "My parents are against the truth, i.e. they are not the Shia of Ahlul Bayt (a.s.)". Imam replied:
"Be good towards them like you would be towards out Shias."
(Al Kafi)
Momin and Kafir Are Equal Under Three Circumstances
Hazrat Imam Muhammad al-Baqir (a.s.) said;
"Allah has not given superiority to a Momin in three circumstances.
First, to return what has been entrusted to you for safe keeping whether it belongs to a Momin or a Kafir.
Second, fulfilling an oath, whether given to a Momin or a Kafir. Third, doing good to the parents, whether they be Momin or Kafir."
(Al Kafi)
A letter on various aspects of Islamic Shariat, written by Hazrat Imam Reza (a.s.) to Mamun, include the following:
"Benevolence to parents is wajib even if both of them are 'Mushrik'. However obedience to parents is not wajib if their order is against the orders of the Creator."
(Oyun-e-Akhbare Reza)
Advice of Imam as-Sadiq (a.s.) to Zakaria Ibne Ibrahim
Zakaria, the son of Ibrahim, was a Christian. Later he converted to Islam and had the honour of meeting Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.). He told Imam (a.s.) "My mother is a Christian and she is old and blind." The Imam advised him,
"Serve your mother and behave kindly towards her. Upon her death, do not leave her dead body to others. Perform her funeral rites yourself."
Thus this statement of the Imam (a.s.) is pregnant with two prophecies. Her death, and her conversion to Islam.
When Zakaria returned to Kufa he began to behave very kindly with his mother. He fed her with his own hands. Changed her clothes, washed and bathed her too. In short, he served his mother in every possible way. His mother asked, "My son you were not so dutiful when you were a Christian. Why is it that now you serve me day and night?"
Zakaria replied, "O my mother. I have a master who is the son of the Prophet of Allah (s.a.w.s.). He advised me to serve you in this way." The mother asked, "Is he a prophet?" "No. But he is a son of the Prophet (s.a.w.s.)." "Such a person must be a Prophet because only prophets teach such manners." The mother remarked.
Zakaria explained to his mother, "The chain of the Prophets came to an end with the Prophet of Islam (s.a.w.s.). He was the seal of the Prophets. The one who has guided me is the son of the Prophet (s.a.w.s.)." The mother said, "My son, the religion of Islam that you have embraced is better than all the religions. Teach me, so that I too may become a Muslim."
So, Zakaria made her recite the 'Kalima' and taught her the true beliefs. Later, this lady performed the Zohrain and the Maghrebain prayers. The same night death approached her. She told her son: "Dear son, repeat to me again whatever you have taught me." Zakaria began to recite while she listened carefully and in this way she passed away.
Displeasing the parents is Haraam and goodness towards them is Wajib, whether they are alive or dead. In other words parents have rights upon their children even after they (the parents) are dead.
If the son or the daughter forgets the parents after their death and does not perform good deeds on their behalf, it is 'Aaq-e-Waledain' irrespective of the fact that the child had fulfilled all his or her rights and served them till the time of their death.
Rights of Parents After Their Death
First: To carry out the Wajib acts which they did not perform during their life time, like Namaz, Roza, Hajj and repayment of debts.
Second: To Act on their will and testament.
Third: To perform various good deeds for their salvation, i.e., to give Sadaqah, to perform charitable acts, and to carry out recommended acts on their behalf. In short, one should strive to the utmost in doing good deeds on their behalf so that Allah may shower His blessing and mercy on them.
The Disobedient Children After the Death of Their Parents
It is narrated from Hazrat Muhammad al-Baqir (a.s.):
"Certainly, if a person is good to his parents when they are alive but forsakes them after they die and does not repay their debts or pray for their forgiveness, Allah will record 'Aaq-e-Waledain' in the account of his deeds. On the other hand, if a person is 'Aaq-e-Waledain' when they are alive but after their death repays their debts and prays for their forgiveness and salvation, Allah will include him among the righteous people".
Single Action, Multiple Rewards
Hazrat Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) said,
"What prevents you from serving your parents in their life and death? The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) remarks about the goodness to parents after death. "Perform their 'namaz' (if some wajib prayers have been omitted by them, the eldest son should perform them himself, or have them fulfilled by someone else on payment. However, if no wajib prayer is remaining upon them, then he could pray Nawafil Namaz for them or have them performed on payment.) Pay Sadaqah on their behalf. Complete their Qaza fasts and fulfill the obligation of their Hajj. Whatever you do, both of you will be rewarded (i.e.you and your parents).
Apart from this, goodness to parents carries double rewards. One for the action itself, and second for the benevolence towards the parents.
Praying (Dua) For the Parents and Seeking Forgiveness On Their Belief
It is narrated from the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) that a man approached him and asked whether his parents have any rights upon him after their death? The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) replied,
"Yes, pray Namaz for them, seek forgiveness on their behalf, respect their tradition, and be good to their relatives."
(Al Kafi)
When is Obedience to the Parents Wajib?
The orders and restraints of the parents are of no significance with respect to the wajib acts and the Divine prohibitions. For example if the parents order the child to drink wine or restrain him from the obligatory prayers and fasts, they should not be obeyed. It is expressly mentioned in this Verse of Surah Luqman:
"And if they contend with you that you should associate with Me what you have no knowledge of, do not obey them..."
(Surah Luqman 31:15)
The traditions also support this Ayat:
"No Obedience of a creature in contravention to the Divine command."
(Behaarul Anwaar)
Apart from these circumstances, obedience to parents is obligatory with regards to the Makruh and Mubah acts. The same applies to the Wajib-e-Kifai.
If by performing these actions, the parents are displeased or hurt, it is 'Haraam', a Greater Sin and causes one to be 'Aaq-e-Waledain'. Suppose the son wishes to proceed on a non-obligatory journey and the parents restrain him as they fear some harm for him, or because they cannot bear to be separated from him; and the son disobeys them and goes ahead with the journey, such a journey is Haraam. It is a journey of sin. Salaat and Fasting is not Qasr for this journey. In short, anything that causes displeasure and hurts the parents, is absolutely Haraam.
Obedience to parents is not obligatory in the following cases:
When it causes unbearable hardships or harm. For instance, if they restrain the son from marriage when he feels the need for it. Or they order the son to divorce his wife without a sound reason. If such an action will result in harm to both the spouses, it is not obligatory to obey the parents.
As far as I know, it is not obligatory to obey parents even in cases where they do not get angry or hurt if their commands are disobeyed.
As far as possible one should obey their orders and restrain from opposing them. Especially when the parents advise their children for their own benefit and without any selfish motive.
Disagreement among the Parents
If a situation arises when there is a disagreement between the parents on any subject, as far as possible, one should try to pacify and satisfy both of them. However, if it is not possible then the wish of the mother should be given precedence.
We have already seen the reasons why her rights far exceed those of the father. She is also more deserving of obedience because being a woman she is more sensitive in comparison to men. The mother is easily disturbed by the slightest hurt caused by her child. She becomes restless and uncontrollable due to her motherly feelings. In contrast, the father exercises reason and intelligence and being less emotional, is much less affected. He would realise that the son is obeying the mother because of the very special status granted to her by Allah and not because he intends to disobey his father due to disregard for him.
Permission of the Parents is Necessary
The Islamic Shariat has prescribed certain matters wherein it is necessary to obtain the permission of both the parents. Or at least of one of them. For example, the Wajib-e-Kifai acts like Jehad, or the Mustahab acts like the recommended fasts, or matters like taking an oath, vow and promises. In all such cases it is Wajib to obtain the parents' permission. The First Martyr1 had mentioned ten topics on the rights of parents in his book "Qawaid". It will be appropriate to mention them.
Journey of the Child and the Martyr's viewpoint
1) Mubah and Mustahab journey without the permission of parents is Haraam. However a business journey and the journey undertaken for acquiring knowledge is allowed according to some Mujtahids.
2) Some Jurists are of the opinion that, obedience to parents is Wajib upon the child in every condition where there exists a doubt. Hence if the parents order their son or daughter to eat with them, and if there is doubt regarding the food, it is incumbent to obey the parents. Because, obedience to parents is Wajib while avoiding food in case of doubt, is Mustahab.
3) If it is time for prayers and the parents would like to get some work done, it is necessary to carry out the orders before offering Namaz. Here again the offering of Namaz at the earliest is Mustahab whereas the obedience to parents is Wajib.
Refraining From Namaz-e-Jamat
1) Parents cannot prevent their child from performing Namaz in congregation unless it causes some problem to them. For example, the absence of the son, while he goes for Fajr or Isha prayers, may cause them anxiety regarding their own security or the safety of their property. Or, it may make them apprehensive about the son's safety.
2) If it is not absolutely obligatory (Wajib-e-Aini) the parents can stop their son from going on Jehad.
3) Regarding the commands, which are Wajib-e-Kifai, the parents can prevent their son or daughter only if there is a certainty or a chance of the Wajib being fulfilled by other people.
4) Some jurists are of the opinion that if one is praying a recommended prayer, he can interrupt it if his parents call him.
5) One must forgo recommended fasts if the father disallows them.
6) In the matter regarding vows and promises, if the parents are against it, then one must not disobey them.
7) It is the duty of the son to ensure that he causes no harm to his parents. And if someone else intends to harm them, the son must do everything in his capacity to ward off the harm.
source : GREATER SINS/Shaheede Mehraab Ayatullah-ul-Uzma Al-Haaj Sayed Abdul Husain Dastghaib
