17 - As You Sow so Shall You Reap!
عَنْ رَسُولِ اللٌّهِ )ص): بِرُّوا آبَاءَكُمْ يَـبِرُّكُمْ أَبْنَاءُكُمْ. عِفُّوا عَنْ نِسَاءِ النٌّاسِ تُعَفُّ نِسَاءُكُمْ.
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him and his family) has said: “Be good towards your parents and your children will be good towards you. (And) Look upon the womenfolk of others with purity (in conduct and intention) and your womenfolk will be looked upon with purity.”
Kanzul `Ummal, Volume 16, Page 466
عَنْ أَبِي الْحَسَنِ عَلِيِّ بنِ مُوسَى )ع) قَالَ: سَأَلَ رَجُلٌ رَسُولَ اللٌّهِ
)ص) مَا حَقُّ الْوَالِدِ عَلَى وَلَدِهِ؟ قَالَ: لاَ يُسَمِّيهِ بِاسْمِهِ وَ لاَ يَمْشِي بَيْنَ يَدَيْهِ وَ لاَ يَجْلِسُ قَبْلَهُ وَ لاَ يَسْتَسِبُّ لَهُ .
Imam ar-Ridha (peace be upon him) narrates that a person once asked the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him and his family): “What are the rights of the father upon the son?” The Noble Prophet replied: “He should not call his father by name, he should not walk ahead of him, he should not sit until his father has seated himself and he should not do such acts as a result of which people abuse his father.”
Biharul Anwar, Volume 74, Page 45
قَالَ رَسُولُ اللٌّهِ )ص): نَظَرُ الْوَلَدِ إِلَى وَالِدَيْهِ حُبّاً لَهُمَا عِبَادَةٌ.
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him and his family) has said: “The look of a child towards his parents out of love for them is an act of worship.”
Biharul Anwar, Volume 74, Page 80
عَنْ أَبِي وَلاَدِ الْحَنَّاطِ قَالَ: سَأَلْتُ أَبَا عَبْدِ اللٌّهِ )ع) عَنْ قَوْلِ اللٌّهِ عَزَّ وَ جَلَّ } وَ بِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْساناً { مَا هٌذَا الإِِحْسَانُ؟ فَقَالَ: الإِِحْسَانُ أَنْ تُحْسِنَ صُحْبَتَهُمَا وَ أَنْ لاَ تُكَلِّفَهُمَا أَنْ يَسْأَلاَكَ شَيْئاً مِمَّا يَحْتَاجَانِ إِلَيْهِ .
Abu Wallad al-Hannat narrates that he once asked Imam as-Sadiq (peace be upon him) about the meaning of the words of Allah (in the Qur’an): (And be good to parents.”)[1]
The Imam (peace be upon him) replied: “Being good to them means to accompany them in a good manner and never to wait for them to ask you for what they need.”
Biharul Anwar, Volume 74, Page 79
21 - Responsibilities Towards One’s Parents
قَالَ الصَّادِقُ )ع): لاَ تَمْلاَ عَيْنَيْكَ مِنَ النَّظَرِ إِلَيْهِمَا إِلاَ بِرَحْمَةٍ وَ رِقَّةٍ وَ لاَ تَرْفَعْ صَوْتَكَ فَوْقَ أَصْوَاتِهِمَا وَ لاَ يَدَيْكَ فَوْقَ أَيْدِيهِمَا وَ لاَ تَتَقَدَّمْ قُدَّامَهُمَا.
Imam as-Sadiq (peace be upon him) has said (in regards to one’s parents): “Do not cast your gaze upon them except with love and compassion; do not raise your voice above theirs; do not raise your hands above theirs; do not walk ahead of them.”
Biharul Anwar, Volume 74, Page 79
قَالَ الصَّادِقُ )ع): مَا يَمْنَعُ الرَّجُلَ مِنْكُمْ أَنْ يَبَرَّ وَالِدَيْهِ حَيَّيْنِ وَ مَيِّتَيْنِ يُصَلِّيَ عَنْهُمَا وَ يَتَصَدَّقَ عَنْهُمَا وَ يَحُجَّ عَنْهُمَا وَ يَصُومَ عَنْهُمَا فَيَكُونَ الَّذِي صَنَعَ لَهُمَا وَ لَهُ مِثْلُ ذٌلِكَ فَيَزِيدَهُ اللٌّهُ عَزَّ وَ جَلَّ بِبِرِّهِ وَ صِلَتِهِ خَيْراً كَثِيراً.
Imam as-Sadiq (peace be upon him) had said: “What prevents a person from doing good to his parents - whether alive or dead - by offering prayers, giving charity, performing Hajj on behalf of them, (knowing that) the rewards of these acts are also granted to him, in addition to his parents? Besides, due to his good deeds and prayers (for them), Allah, the Mighty and the Glorious, shall grant him abundant good.”
Biharul Anwar, Volume 74, Page 46
23 - Evil Parents And Kindness
عَنْ أَبِي جَعْفَرٍ )ع) قَالَ: ثَلاَثٌ لَمْ يَجْعَلِ اللٌّهُ عَزَّ وَ جَلَّ لِأَحَدٍ فِيهِنَّ رُخْصَةً أَدَاءُ الأََمَانَةِ إِلَى الْبَرِّ وَ الْفَاجِرِ وَ الْوَفَاءُ بِالْعَهْدِ لِلْبَرِّ وَ الْفَاجِرِ وَ بِرُّ الْوَالِدَيْنِ بَرَّيْنِ كَانَا أَوْ فَاجِرَيْنِ.
Imam Muhammad al-Baqir (peace be upon him) has said: “There are three things which Allah, the Mighty and the Glorious has not permitted anyone to forsake: returning a trust to its owner, irrespective of whether he is a good person or an evil one; fulfilling one’s promises and covenants, irrespective of whether it has been made to a good person or an evil one; being good and kind towards one’s parents, irrespective of whether they are good or evil.”
Biharul Anwar, Volume 74, Page 56
عَنِ الرِّضَا )ع) فِي كِتَابِهِ إِلَى الْمَأْمُونِ قَالَ: وَ بِرُّ الْوَالِدَيْنِ وَاجِبٌ وَ إِنْ كَانَا مُشْرِكَيْنِ وَ لاَ طَاعَةَ لَهُمَا فِي مَعْصِيَةِ الْخَالِقِ.
In a letter to Ma`mun, Imam ar-Ridha (peace be upon him) wrote: “To do good to one’s parents is obligatory, even if they are of the polytheists, however, they should not be obeyed in acts that go against the commands of Allah.”
Biharul Anwar, Volume 74, Page 72
25 - Visiting the Graves of Parents
قَالَ رَسُولُ اللٌّهُ (ص): مَنْ زَارَ قَبْرَ وَالِدَيهِ أَوْ أَحَدِهِمَا فِي كُلِّ جُمْعَةٍ مَرَّةً غَفَرَ اللٌّهُ لَهُ وَ كَتَبَ لَهُ بَارًّا.
It has been narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him and his family) said: “Whoever visits the graves of his parents or one of them every Friday, Allah shall forgive his sins and shall regard him to be of those who had been kind to his parents.”
Kanzul `Ummal, Volume 16, Page 468
26 - Kindness to Parents and Paradise
عَنْ أَبِي الْحَسَنِ )ع) قَالَ: قَالَ رَسُولُ اللٌّهِ )ص) كُنْ بَارّاً وَ اقْتَصِرْ عَلَى الْجَنَّةِ وَ إِنْ كُنْتَ عَاقّاً فَظّاً فَاقْتَصِرْ عَلَى النَّارِ.
Imam ar-Ridha (peace be upon him) relates that the Noble Prophet (peace be upon him and his family) has said: “Be good and kind to your parents so that your recompense is paradise, and if you have been disowned by them, your abode shall be the fire (of Hell).”
Al-Kafi, Volume 2, pg.348
عَنْ أَبِي عَبْدِ اللٌّهِ )ع) قَالَ: لَوْ عَلِمَ اللٌّهُ شَيْئاً أَدْنَى مِنْ أُفٍّ لَنَهَى عَنْهُ وَ هُوَ مِنْ أَدْنَى الْعُقُوقِ وَ مِنَ الْعُقُوقِ أَنْ يَنْظُرَ الرَّجُلُ إِلَى وَالِدَيْهِ فَيُحِدَّ النَّظَرَ إِلَيْهِمَا.
Imam as-Sadiq (peace be upon him) has said: “Had Allah known of a thing more trivial and insignificant than the word ‘ugh’, he would have forbidden it (to be spoken to the parents). Uttering ‘ugh’ (to the parents) is the mildest form of ill conduct towards the parents. One of the ways in which a person can be regarded as being disowned by the parents is that he casts a hard and stern look upon them.”
Al-Kafi, Volume 4, Page 50
عَنْ أَبِي عَبْدِ اللٌّهِ )ع) قَالَ: مَنْ نَظَرَ إِلَى أَبَوَيْهِ نَظَرَ مَاقِتٍ وَ هُمَا ظَالِمَانِ لَهُ لَمْ يَقْبَلِ اللٌّهُ لَهُ صَلاَةً.
Imam as-Sadiq (peace be upon him) has said: “Allah shall not accept the prayers of a person who looks at his parents with hatred, even if they have been unfair to him!”
Al-Kafi, Volume 4, Page 50
قَالَ أَمِيـرُ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ )ع): مَنْ أَحْزَنَ وَالِدَيْهِ فَقَدْ عَقَّهُمَا.
The Commander of the Faithful (peace be upon him) has said: “One who causes his parents to become sad has indeed been disowned by them.”
Biharul Anwar, Volume 74, Page 64
عن أَبِي جَعْفَرٍ )ع) قَالَ: إِنَّ أَبِي نَظَرَ إِلَى رَجُلٍ وَ مَعَهُ ابْنُهُ يَمْشِي وَ الإِبْنُ مُتَّكِئٌ عَلَى ذِرَاعِ الأََبِ قَالَ فَمَا كَلَّمَهُ أَبِي )ع) مَقْتاً لَهُ حَتَّى فَارَقَ الدُّنْيَا.
Imam Muhammad al-Baqir (peace be upon him) relates: “Once my father saw a person and his son walking together. As they walked, the son was leaning against the arm of his father. (This act of the son was so abhorrent and infuriating to my father that) he (peace be upon him) never spoke to him throughout his life.”
