It should be known that the parents are not the absolute authority upon all the affairs of Haraam and Halaal. Their authority is restricted by the dual dictum, that they must not prohibit a Wajib thing and nor should order something Haraam. If a situation demands the parents have to be disobeyed in absolute obedience to the commands of Allah and His Prophet (s.a.w.s.).
"And We have enjoined on man goodness to his parents, and if they contend with you that you should associate (others) with Me, of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them; to Me is your return, so I will inform you of what you did."
(Surah Ankaboot 29:8)
Obedience to parents is highly stressed so that they may not be caused even the slightest discomfort by the disobedience of their children. It is totally prohibited by the Quran. Thus if the disobedience of the parents would incur their wrath then it is compulsory for the children to obey them.
Further Details Regarding Obedience to Parents
Sometimes the parents may disallow something or order their children to do something. But if the child does not obey they are not angry. In such cases it is permitted for the child to follow his choice. For example the parents refrain their son to proceed on a journey that would cause hardship. But they do not mind if he insists on it. In this case it is Mubah for the son to go on this journey. However if this journey would cause the anger of one's parents, it is a journey of sin and during this journey one has to pray namaz as complete (not Qasr) and also observe the obligatory fasts.
Obedience of the Husband is Wajib Upon the Wife
The Almighty Allah and the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) have commanded the wife to obey her husband. The Holy Quran informs,
"Men are the maintainers of women because Allah has made some of them to excel others and because they spend out of their property; the good women are therefore obedient, guarding the unseen as Allah has guarded."
(Surah Nisa 4:34)
Allah, the Almighty has given men superiority over women and appointed them as the protectors of women. This is due to the fact that men have been provided by Allah with many qualities in great measure as compared to women, like strength, bravery etc. Further they spend their wealth upon their women. So the best women are those who are loyal to their husbands and obedient to their commands. They protect his property and their own chastity in the absence of their husbands. The Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) has also said,
"Prostration of a human for another human being is not permitted. (If it had been) I would have ordered the wife to prostrate before her husband."
(Wasaelush Shia)
Dignity in the Marital Affairs
Numerous traditions emphasise that women should be obedient to their husbands. Apart from this, women should know that it is highly recommended that they please their husbands in all matters. It is the best worship of a woman. However to satisfy the sexual desires of the husband is absolutely wajib according to the consensus of the scholars. Similarly the husbands permission is required by the wife if she intends to go out. Even if she goes to visit her relatives or parents it is obligatory for her to seek the husbands permission. If she leaves the husband's house without his permission, the angels curse her till she returns.
Non-Essential Expenses Should Have the Prior Sanction of the Husband
Apart from the necessary expenses, the wife should obtain the husband's permission for other things even if she wants to spend from her personal wealth. But in case of obligatory expenses she does not need the husband's permission. For example, Hajj, Zakat, Khums and even for spending upon her parents. Even if the husband restrains her she must carry out these obligations. If a woman obeys her husband to please Allah, she has undoubtedly obeyed the Divine commands and the instructions of the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.). It is certainly the best worship for a woman.
Referring to the Unjust Ruler is Not Allowed
So far, we have seen that obedience to Allah is obligatory and so is the obedience to the Holy Prophet (s.a.w.s.) and his Twelve Successors (Imams a.s). and whoever else Allah has ordered to obey. Their obedience is also a must i.e. of the Fuqaha, in case of religious matters. It is absolutely 'Haraam' to appeal for justice in the courts of the unjust rulers. Referring to them is the same as seeking the help of Satan. Whatever benefit is derived through such cases is also Haraam even if one is the rightful claimant. Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.) says,
"If one files a suit of law in the court of a ruler, even if the plaintiff is on the right, his claim would tantamount to his making Satan (false deity) his judge. And whatever he gets through this Judgement is Haraam even though it was from his rights."
"...then if you quarrel about anything, refer it to Allah and the Apostle..."
(Surah Nisa 4:59)
The Religious Scholar Who Does Not Practise Piety is Not to Be Followed
Like it is prohibited to seek the counsel of the unjust ruler even if one is on the right; in the same way it is not allowed to seek religious advice from the scholars who pursue material wealth and worldly honour. The qualifications of a Faqih have been mentioned in the foregoing pages. Anyone who does not fulfill these qualities is not to be followed. It is Haraam to refer to them. A couple of traditions are quoted below in this regard.
Religious Leaders Who Worship the World are Bandits on the Highway to Allah
It is narrated from Imam Ja'far as-Sadiq (a.s.): "When you see a religious scholar in love of this world, do not consider him religious. Certainly one who loves an object, his condition and disposition is like that of his beloved. (It means that one who loves this world will not care for the Hereafter). Allah revealed upon Hazrat Dawood (a.s.)
"O Dawood do not make an Aalim an intermediary between you and Me, who is involved in the love of this world. He will hinder you from My path (i.e. he will make you too a worshipper of the world like himself). Certainly such Aalims are bandits who waylay the people approaching My abode. The least that I would do to them is that I shall remove from their hearts the love of conversation with Me and sweetness too."
(Al Kafi)
A Faqih Should Only be For Allah
Imam Muhammad Baqir (a.s.) states,
"If one obtains knowledge in order to become conceited or to argue with the foolish people or to obtain wealth or to attract people towards himself then he has certainly made the Fire his abode. Verily, acquisition of wealth is not permitted but for ones own family (needs)."
(Al Kafi)
The Common People are 'Deficient'
People who leave aside the scholars of Ahlul Bayt (a.s.) and refer to others in order to satisfy their selfish desires, are termed as 'deficient' (which means those who willfully neglect the Divine commands). They are mentioned in the following verse of the Holy Quran:
"Have you then considered him who takes his low desire for his god."
(Surah Jasiyah 45:23)
Tawheed and Shirk in Worship
The Almighty Allah has invited all the creatures to pay obeisance to Him in order that His Majesty may become manifest. The people can obtain numerous blessings and unlimited mercy and achieve such a position which even imagination cannot visualise. "So no soul knows what is hidden for them of that which will refresh the eyes; a reward for what they did."
(Surah Sajdah 32:17)
The Lord of the Worlds and the Lowly Man
The human being is a lowly creature. So lowly that he cannot even seek nearness to the Almighty, let alone achieve it. That is why Allah, by his unsurpassed Wisdom and infinite Mercy appointed the Last Prophet (s.a.w.s.) as an intermediary to form a firm link between the lowly man and the Almighty Allah.
Due to the presence of this Wasilah (intermediary) the soul of man is affected to such a degree that it undergoes a transformation. Just as alchemy changes the base metal into pure gold, the heart of the worshipper become pure and is filled by the light of the Creator, repelling the darkness of Ignorance. Gradually he rises in status as his worship enables him to rise up towards the Divine. He thus achieves the best of both the worlds.
Purity of Intention
There are some conditions for acceptance of the acts of worship. The most important condition is purity of intention (Niyyat). Purity of intention with respect to a deed has the same significance that the soul has for the body. Absence of the purity of intention during worship takes man further away from Allah.
The Holy Quran contains numerous verses in this regard. A few of them are quoted below:
1) "And they were not enjoined anything except that they should serve Allah, being sincere to Him in obedience."
(Surah Bayyanah 98:5)
2) "Say: I am commanded that I should serve Allah, being sincere to Him in obedience."
(Surah Zumar 39:11)
3) "Say: My Lord has enjoined justice, and set upright your faces at every time of prayer and call on Him, being sincere to Him in obedience."
(Surah Araf 7:29)
4) "Say: I am only a mortal like you; it is revealed to me that your god is One God, therefore whoever hopes to meet his Lord, he should do good deeds, and not join anyone in the service of His Lord."
(Surah Kahf 18:110)
source : GREATER SINS by Ayatullah-ul-Uzma Sayed Abdul Husain Dastghaib Shirazi (r.a.)
