The cultural invasion of the minds

Today we suffer from early maturity. This is due to the cultural invasion of the minds and spirits of our youth by the voices and images of the atheist global media. Pornography is an international catastrophe causing sexual arousal. Therefore, it is both religiously ordained and morally expected of the Islamic government and people, the rich, the relatives and the parents to do all they can to ease the marriage of the youth. They should eliminate the wrong customs and traditions, discard western traditions, and forget imposing strict conditions so that the young men and women's beliefs, principles of belief and human behavior remain partially intact. Thus, they may be saved from falling into sin.

Do not be too haughty. Let the divine decrees, the orders of the Noble Prophet Muhammad and the Immaculate Imams be put into practice. It has unfortunately been observed that some parents make such gestures during marriage proposal meetings that one might think they are powerful beings.

They think that their child is a prince or princess and their marriage ceremonies should be conducted like those at the time of Pharaoh. They make such lavish proposals that the other family is astonished and is forced to forget about the marriage. Then the children are forced to find illegitimate friends and commit various sexual sins to satisfy their instincts. The Holy Quran has considered haughtiness as one of Satan's attributes:

.... and they bowed down not so Satan: he refused and was haughty: he was of those who reject faith. [Holy Quran: Baqara 2:34]

(God) said:

Get thee down from this: it is not for thee to be arrogant here: get out, for thou art of the meanest (of creatures)." [Holy Quran: A'raf 7:13]

Ali (Pbuh) said:

You should not be haughty with people and God regarding daily matters, since verily haughtiness is one of the greatest sins and worst defects, and it is the facade, appearance and attribute of Satan. [Mizan al-Hikmat, v.8, p.298]

He also said:

Avoid haughtiness since this attribute is the start of rebellion and transgression against God. [Mizan al-Hikmat, v.8, pp.300-302]

That noble man also said:

Haughtiness is the worst disposition. [Ibid]

The Prophet (Pbuh) said:

Avoid haughtiness since verily man continues to live in haughtiness, so much so that God the Almighty and Glorious says:

O' you who record the deeds, record the name of my servant as one of the worst oppressors. [Ibid]

He also said to Abuzar:

O' Abuzar, whoever dies with the slightest bit of haughtiness in his heart will not smell the sweet scent of Heaven, unless he repents before he dies and gives up haughtiness. [Ibid]

How come a creature formed from sperm and powerless in the face of disasters is haughty with people and God? How come he considers himself to be superior to others while nothing in this world works according to his will?

Imam Sadiq (Pbuh) narrated his ancestors as having said a fight started between Salman and a man. The man rudely asked: “who are you to confront me?” Salman answered: "I am the first, and you were at first an unclean sperm. I am the last, and at last you will be a stinking corpse in the grave. When the Hereafter comes and the balance is set up, then whoever has done more good will be nobler, and whoever has done little will be inferior." [Bihar al-Anwar, v.73, p.231]

Allameh Majlesi has proposed the following treatment and remedy for this dangerous disease:

There are two ways to treat haughtiness and attain modesty, one being scientific and the other practical. The scientific approach is to get to know oneself and one's Creator. This cognizance is enough to purify one's inner being from haughtiness. The reason for this is that with this real knowledge of one's self and one's existence, one will realize that he is inferior to anything else and he has no right but to be humble and down to earth. Once he gets to know God through the signs of the universe and the soul, and delving into the verses of the Holy Quran, then he would realize that no one but God deserves Sovereignty, Grandeur and Haughtiness. The practical approach to cure haughtiness is to be humble before God and people in all actions, deeds and behavior; to observe the morality of the humble people and use the pious ones as his model. He should note that the Prophet (Pbuh), who is the best of all people used to sit down on the ground to eat food and said a servant eats food like other servants.[Bihar al-Anwar, v.73, pp.201-205]

Therefore you should be humble before your son or daughter regarding marriage. This means that you should consider your child who is at the peak of his/her natural instincts, hopes and aspirations and not consider your own customs, traditions, and conditions. You should be lenient in your conditions, and minimize your expectations from the other family. Thus a happy, blessed and secure marriage will take place and the couple can conveniently live together.